When we first started debating whether or not to have William's speech re-evaluated, I was kinda on the fence. I believed (and still do) that if we did nothing, his delay would eventually correct itself and we'd understand him more and more as he got older. But on the other hand, if there are things we can do now to make it easier on him (like when he starts school in the fall), why not do it. And I was fine with that too.
When they came back with the diagnosis of atypical articulation, it made sense. His articulation was/is atypical. Fine, I'm ok with that. Plus it qualified him for speech therapy. I'm ok with that. But then we started getting flyers from the early intervention people with words like "disability" and "disabled" and "special needs". And I was surprised that I really wasn't ok with that.
I never thought about that way. It was a problem that he had that could most likely be fixed. He wasn't disabled; we just couldn't understand what he said. He didn't have special needs; he just needed speech therapy. He would be fine.
And he will be fine. And I know that early intervention sees a wide range of kids with a wide range of needs. And I know there's nothing wrong with having special needs or a disability, but it still made me sad.
Then he started therapy (finally) and he loves it. He loves Miss P and so does Nick. Nick "helps" during therapy sessions and they think she's just about the best thing ever. Almost equal with grandparents. She teaches him how to say words and how to move his mouth and teaches me how to teach him. We don't spend a lot of time doing formal teaching, but it's more an ongoing thing when we can, when it comes up. Sometimes he'll ask to do his face cards or his word sheets or sing the "apple song", but most of the time we work on things organically.
The last two weeks he's made tremendous progress. He used to say dada for any two syllable word he couldn't pronounce. Like his name. Last week he called himself "Wi". I cried a little. He used to say ah-ah for apple. Now it's ap-PULL. He practices on his own and says "I DID IT!" when he knows he gets it right. And I have to hold back a few happy tears. He's stopped using sign language for milk and more and can now say "muc" and "mo", whereas before he wouldn't even attempt them because he couldn't come close to saying them.
It still hurts my heart to watch him struggle and have to think how to say something that comes naturally to most of us. And my heart soars when I see how proud he is of how far he's come.
We had his transition meeting to transfer services to the public school system when he turns three. They used words like "special education" and that hurt too. I know what we're dealing with her is minor compared to what some parents and kids go through. And I can now imagine how much it hurts when they hear those words and know they will keep hearing them.
I'm really glad that 'Wi' is enjoying the speech therapy and that it's working.
It never occurred to me how much the labels might hurt. Thanks for making me think!
Posted by: Nico | May 25, 2009 at 23:59
Four years ago I started Following Elias: http://www.parents.com/dgroups/persona.jsp?plckPersonaPage=PersonaBlog&plckUserId=2bda4ddea688e36a3447963d739fcab7&userId=2bda4ddea688e36a3447963d739fcab7&ordersrc=rdparents0080&
Watching Elias grow up has given me much more perspective on "special needs" than I had before. Yes, labels hurt because they create distance between us, and bring all kinds of stereotypes with them. You are doing exactly the right thing by getting help early and it is a blessing that the help comes in a package that Willim sees as fun. I wish so much that I had understood this 30 years ago, when my daughter might well have benefited from additional help.
Posted by: Jeanette1ca | May 26, 2009 at 01:53
Hooray for William! Sounds like very exciting progress is happening. I'm sorry about the labels, but so glad that he is receiving such wonderful help, and that it's having such a prompt effect.
Our triplets needed a little once-a-week speech-language therapy when they were 3 1/2 to 4, and then graduated. However both daughters still have slight lisps at 9 years old, so we're thinking about signing up for private speech help for them again. If it helps them, we'll be glad to do it.
Posted by: tripleblessings | May 26, 2009 at 13:48
it just goes to show what an amazing parent you are...the labels are wrong and hurtful and you choosing not to use them or be "okay" with them is a strong statement that William is just fine and his needs are everyone's.
Hooray for William. He's progression is amazing. STANDING OVATION for him. :)
Posted by: Kir | May 28, 2009 at 11:41
Ainsley will most likely end up needing some form of speech therapy. She won't most likely qualify until school begins, though. Her apraxia has almost fully resolved itself, but she still has some small problems with it. Because my husband was in speech for so long and it can be genetic, I have kind of accepted it and just try to work with her as much as I can. I asked her teachers in preschool the other day if they understand her and they thought it was a strange question. Apparently they do, but there are some children in there that I could not understand if my life depended on it.
It is good to remind myself, too, that much of this is developmental and will change. It sounds like his speech teacher is awesome! What a blessing! :-)
P.S. I teach gifted education and strangely enough, many of my students receive speech services. I know it is hard to hear "special needs" or "special education", but just know (even though I know you already know) that it doesn't reflect what he is going to show you he can do when school begins. :-)
Posted by: Sara | May 28, 2009 at 14:19
Coming from a mom of two kids with special needs and also I work with children with special needs, I know it is hard to accept these "labels". But if you look at it in the sense that William is just getting what he needs and also with this label, it makes it easier to get him what he needs to be successful. It took me three hard school years to finally get my daughter tested and help in school and these years were not easy in any way. So just keep your chin up and know that this is just the way to get your precious son the help he needs....Also as we all know, ALL children are special in one way or another!!! Have a GREAT day!!!
Posted by: Allison | May 30, 2009 at 13:28